The one about 'you're engaged, here's how to get to know your in-laws' got referenced, too, when Siz commented to Tosha that she could not imagine anything less likely to happen with Bella. The relevant paragraphs, for amusement:
If your fiance has grown brothers or sisters, their approval can go a long way in making you truly a part of the family. Encourage him to spend time with his brother, and all the genial friendly teasing of that kind. Ask his sister to tell you the things he will not admit himself: the little childhood foibles and stories that knit the family together. Do not put yourself or your preferences forward, but stick to friendly, easy, communal topics.
But in particular, reach out to his brother’s wife, if there is such a person. She, of all people, can tell you the secrets of marrying in. Invite her out to do something frivolous and coax all the best stories of the family out of her, the things she wishes someone had told her. Get her to look on you as a younger sister, in need of guidance and gentle assistance. If she has children, offer to be of help to them, even at cost to your own family. Gentle, friendly outings - a tea shop, to try on clothes, a walk through one of New London’s parks - may be best, but daring younger women might choose to shop for honeymoon attire or other such amusements together.
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Date: 2015-09-02 10:32 pm (UTC)If your fiance has grown brothers or sisters, their approval can go a long way in making you truly a part of the family. Encourage him to spend time with his brother, and all the genial friendly teasing of that kind. Ask his sister to tell you the things he will not admit himself: the little childhood foibles and stories that knit the family together. Do not put yourself or your preferences forward, but stick to friendly, easy, communal topics.
But in particular, reach out to his brother’s wife, if there is such a person. She, of all people, can tell you the secrets of marrying in. Invite her out to do something frivolous and coax all the best stories of the family out of her, the things she wishes someone had told her. Get her to look on you as a younger sister, in need of guidance and gentle assistance. If she has children, offer to be of help to them, even at cost to your own family. Gentle, friendly outings - a tea shop, to try on clothes, a walk through one of New London’s parks - may be best, but daring younger women might choose to shop for honeymoon attire or other such amusements together.